Changing with Cider: Valentine’s Day

Last year, I had a friend who begged his mom to not come into school on Valentine’s Day. He was so distraught about the idea of seeing happy couples all around him while he was single. While it was a bit dramatic, I could still understand his reaction a little bit as he was infatuated with this girl who had no interest in him.

I’ve never celebrated Valentine’s Day, and I don’t see an importance in it. In my eyes, it’s always just been a commercialized holiday to sell chocolates. However, dramatic outbreaks about the holiday from people I knew made me think a bit. Why do people care so much about this holiday?

I didn’t understand the reasoning until I saw the shift within myself. My first introduction to Valentine’s Day was a third grade elementary school party. My mom and I made gifts for the whole class, and I loved making my own Valentine’s box year after year. For a few years, I only saw Valentine’s Day as a day full of chocolates and gift-giving. While I knew about romance, the holiday was all about my friends and teachers. Even with this connection, I began to find myself caught up on the romantic aspect of Valentine’s Day. I started getting upset about ‘being alone’ when I had never cared before. 

The media was the main thing to blame for this change in perspective. Although, I can also dedicate some of this change to the fact I was growing up. As soon as the end of January hit, I’d see commercials about couples and hear about who was going out with who. I had an envy for what those people had, and it made me feel like I was failing because I wasn’t with someone on this one day of the year.

Obviously people don’t want to be alone on a holiday that is all about love, but sometimes ‘alone’ is only seen as ‘single.’ Romantic love is a main focus, and sometimes it feels like it’s too focused on. Every commercial or card I see is about romantic partners, and there’s no acknowledgment of any other type of love. Friends and family often seem to be forgotten about. 

When familial and platonic relationships are taken out of the picture, it can make people forget  this day is supposed to be about all loves. There are other people in a person’s life besides romantic partners. These people also need to be cherished and celebrated. While romantic partners help shape people, so do friends and family. These people are vital to how a person develops, and it’s important to show them the care they deserve.

While I’m not saying that people should buy bouquets of flowers or big boxes of chocolates for their friends, I still believe that it’s important to show them that they’re cared for. It doesn’t need to be a grand gesture. It can be as simple as a small card with a handwritten note. One time, I made a bunch of small bags full of candy and heart themed decorations with a written note attached. It only took a few hours to make 20 or so bags, and seeing the smiles on friend’s faces made the time worth it. 

There’s this need to feel cared for or loved, especially on Valentine’s Day. The issue is some people don’t realize being loved doesn’t mean being loved by a spouse. Sometimes people don’t need to be in a romantic relationship at certain times in their lives, and it could be beneficial for them to focus more on the love they are receiving and giving to their friends and families instead. Love is such a broad and emotional feeling that shouldn’t be categorized into boxes of importance. All types of love can be celebrated on Valentine’s Day⸺ and they should be.